Jñānāgni

How to get rid of such negative emotions as hatred, jealousy, anger, etc.? We may be intellectually convinced that that these negative emotions are harmful to ourselves and everyone else, but we sometimes find that these negativities lurking around in our own minds. How do we get rid of these negativities?

Well, here’s a suggestion from God himself!

O noble soul, open thy divine sight and regard and honour all beings as myself. Wise is he who looks with an equal eye upon all beings, seeing the one indwelling God in the hearts of all. He who meditates on my divine nature as present in every man becomes free from rivalry, from jealousy, from hatred, and from the consciousness of ego.

— Srimad Bhagavatam: The Wisdom of God,
Translated by Swami Prabhavananda. p. 303

Indeed, we all come from the same Source, we all ultimately go back to the same Source, and it’s the same Source or God who lives in the hearts of all beings and expresses Himself (or Herself or Itself) variously. The expressions themselves may be beautiful or distorted, but they keep changing, they are not fixed or eternal. God, the indweller,  outlives everything else, and He alone is the one eternal existence. When I recognize that the same God who lives and works through me lives in and works through the other person too, there is no question of hatred or jealousy in me. In fact, the other person is just another expression of myself, he/she is a mirror reflecting an aspect of myself and helps me discover myself. Only when we forget the oneness of existence and give too much importance to the differences, that’s when these negative emotions raise their head.

What happens when somebody else hates you and attacks you? When somebody attacks you, it’s reasonable for you to defend yourself, it’s perfectly okay to defend yourself. But even then, remembering the oneness of existence and acknowledging that the other person is the same as you in the core will prevent you from introducing further hatred. Further hatred on your part only escalates the problem, whereas when you look at the problem objectively, it always helps bring the situation under control and you can even help the other person overcome his hatred. This attitude has always worked for me. When I find myself having some problem with somebody, I internally acknowledge that we are both same in the core, it’s the same God who expresses himself through both of us differently. When I do this, the feeling of hatred immediately dies down even though the difference of opinion may persist for some time. Just that we both are looking at the same thing from different perspectives, the glasses might be of different colours, but it’s the same eye that looks through the different glasses. These differences are temporary, the clouds of misunderstanding has to pass, however dark they may be, however hopelessly overcast the conditions are, the clouds will disperse sooner or later, and suddenly, we find that the sun of understanding has always been shining resplendently. In fact, when you look at it from the perspective of the sun, the clouds have almost no existence at all!

Let me leave with you with a quote from Swami Vivekananda, who puts it in his own characteristically strong manner:

In one word, the ideal of Vedanta is to know man as he really is, and this is its message, that if you cannot worship your brother man, the manifested God, how can you worship a God who is unmanifested?