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What is ego?

So, what exactly is this ego?

Ego is that state of awareness which thinks of you as separate from the other. Ego thinks in terms of guiltiness and shames and glories of the past, and it thinks in terms of fears and hopes about the future. It never thinks about what ‘is’, but always thinks about ‘what was’ and ‘what could be’. Ego thinks in terms of many as opposed to the One, the one pure intelligence.

What is pure intelligence?

It’s commonly called ‘common sense’, or the ‘presence of mind’. At any moment, when you do the most appropriate thing in the most appropriate way without any influence of the stored up memories of your past and without any regards to fears of failure or hopes of future rewards, you let the pure intelligence act through you. This pure intelligence may be called the Soul or super-ego or God or universal consciousness. The term ‘pure intelligence’ is used here in preference for others because ‘intelligence’ is one term you can easily identify with compared to the other terms.

So, how is the ego different from pure intelligence?

Ego is self identity. It’s labeling yourself, painting the ‘pure you’ with distinct qualities. And this ego labels others too. The ego cannot but think in terms of these qualities and it always defines yourself as somebody distinct from others. But these qualities and definitions are not fixed or constant. The paint wears off in time and as it wears off, the ego freshly paints the worn off patches of with new qualities and new definitions, and gives an illusion of continuity. This illusion of continuity of qualities strengthen self identity. Now, completely strip off these qualities and definitions, and you will find that the ‘pure you’ and the ‘pure other’ are one and the same, there has always been only one existence, call it the One, or the Soul, or God. The consciousness of this God is pure intelligence itself.

The foremost quality of ego is self preservation. It always tries to impose it’s definition of yourself onto others around you and into your own future. That’s where the problem comes and conflict comes. You define yourself as somebody now, and you want to preserve this definition of yourself into the future until you get a better definition. You are afraid that if you lose this definition of yourself, you will fall. You will become lesser. This fear is the hallmark of the ego. So, when you actually get to the future, your ‘new’ ego tries to define itself anew and comes into conflict with your older definition of yourself that tries to preserve itself. Similarly, when you try to impose your definition to others, the ‘other’ ego resists it and there comes a conflict. So you see, there is a conflict both in terms time and space. Remove this illusion of time and space and there is no more conflict. But pure intelligence doesn’t need any preservation, because it knows itself to be only existence.

So, how do I identify whether I’m acting egoistic or with God consciousness?

This ‘attempt’ to identify is itself ego. Don’t ‘try’ to identify, but just be. Pure intelligence doesn’t ‘try’ or ‘attempt’, it just IS.

Pure intelligence works in harmony. In reality, there is is only one, the pure existence, consciousness, bliss absolute. It’s not ‘my’ existence or ‘my’ consciousness or ‘your’ consciousness, but it’s THE consciousness, THE existence and bliss. It’s not that I am intelligent or I was intelligent or you are intelligent, but it’s THE pure intelligence. This intelligence acts harmoniously. That is, the intelligence acts through you now in a certain way and it may act through you in a different way in some point of time in the future, but there is no conflict between both the ways. There is harmony. So, when pure intelligence acts through you now and does something, it’s helpful for you in the future, and you’ll never regret. Similarly, the intelligence may work differently through you and somebody else (a different point in space), but there is no conflict between both of you. There is only harmony. All of us complement and complete each other and don’t conflict each other when there is only intelligence and not egos acting.

But the ego is always intent on conflict. The ego says “I’m right and he is wrong”, or, ” I was wrong”, or “I made a mistake”, or “I’m afraid that I will fail”, or “I should be like this in the future”. Note that pure intelligence at times uses idea of future as a guidance for present action, as in reserving a ticket now for your future travel. But, pure intelligence is all about the present. Ego, on the other hand, lives in the past or in the future. When you imagine unreal things, like a future dialogue between you and somebody else, know that it’s the ego. You may imagine your future now, but you can never live your future, sure it may become real when it happens eventually, but it’s unreal as of now, it’s just imagination. When you feel guilty about your past mistake, or relive your past glory, know that it’s the ego.

Pure intelligence is about reality. Ego is about imagination. Note that pure intelligence visualises, but never imagines. Visualisation is creativity, imagination is speculation. Through visualisation, you create your own world for yourself. Through imagination, you lose yourselves in the mires of time.

Ego always needs and craves for something. But pure intelligence is rich by itself and doesn’t need anything from outside, because, it knows that there is no outside.

Pure intelligence fulfills. Ego imitates. When you are in the state of ego, you try to imitate your own past success or you imitate somebody else. Pure intelligence is ever original, ever creative.

Ego always looks up to others for help. It looks for an authority, It wants a rulebook so that it can imitate. Pure intelligence is intelligence itself, so it doesn’t need somebody external to lay down rules for itself. But beware, pure intelligence doesn’t even lay down it’s own rules for itself. When you say you are sufficient by yourself and you will never accept others opinions, it’s still your ego. Pure intelligence, though it doesn’t need external rules, does appreciate the wisdom behind rules laid down by wise men, which is nothing but an expression of the same pure intelligence, though at different time through a different person. Pure intelligence is always intent on finding harmony.

But acting without rules doesn’t mean chaos. Pure intelligence not needing rules don’t mean it acts haphazardly, but it helps you do take the most appropriate action now in the most appropriate way.

This pure intelligence is God, it’s You, it’s Now. It’s the only reality. All else is stored up memory and imagination. All else is unreal.

(On June 20, 2008, I asked these questions to myself and got these answers popped up in the awareness. I posted this earlier in my old blog. Nevertheless, it’s worth reading again.)

Heaven of Freedom

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high
Where knowledge is free
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments
By narrow domestic walls
Where words come out from the depth of truth
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way
Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit
Where the mind is led forward by thee
Into ever-widening thought and action
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

— Rabindranath Tagore (born 7 May 1861)

Ask yourself and keep on asking…

Do not interrupt the flight of your soul;
do not distress what is best in you;
do not enfeeble your spirit with half wishes and half thoughts.
Ask yourself and keep on asking until you find the answer,
for one may have known something many times,
acknowledged it;
one may have willed something many times,
attempted it — and yet,
only the deep inner motion,
only the heart’s indescribable emotion,
only that will convince you
that what you have acknowledged belongs to you,
that no power can take it from you —
for only the truth that builds up is truth for you.

Søren Kierkegaard (5 May 1813 – 11 November 1855)

Taming Hitler, Gandhigiri style

I had a strange dream this morning. I was a college student again, and was in the classroom along with other students. Now enters Hitler the lecturer. The real Hitler with the hair pulled from right to left and that funny toothbrush mustache. He announces the students, today, we’re gonna write a test. Oh my, I hate tests and exams, what do I do? I slowly and stealthily sneak out of the classroom through the back door and hide behind the bushes.

Hitler finds this out and drags me out of the bushes into the classroom. There he slaps me on my left cheek in front of everybody. Ooh, that was a heavy blow, and humiliating too. But for whatever reason, I take a step towards him and get closer to him. He slaps me again in the same cheek, I get one more step closer. He slaps me for the third time, and I get another step closer to him. Now I’m so close that our noses almost touch each other! So close it’s difficult for him to slap me. Moreover he has that puzzled look on his face. Now, I suddenly hug him! (oh yes, I’d have kissed if he was my girlfriend, but that’s another story :p) So, I hugged him and hugged him so lovingly (!) that I could almost feel the chemical reactions taking place in his brain with the anger getting transformed into love, and his awareness shifting from the lower part of the brain to the higher. I hug him for what seemed like a minute and then let go. He looks totally overwhelmed. He politely asks me to sit in the bench and take up the test…. Oh, that was a crap of a question paper as usual, and I don’t want to add to that crap in the answer paper so I keep the answers blank and white. The test was over and before leaving the classroom, Hitler tells everyone that he is a changed man and he won’t act like the stupid he was acting before. There ends the dream.

Strange dream. But not a normal dream. I was so full of awareness when it happened that I still remember exactly what happened in my mind when that slap and hug happened. So, here is an action replay taking you through what happened in my mind when the event took place.

Firstly, it was not a preplanned act, and I had no intentions to change or transform Hitler. I was only aware of my own feelings in reaction to the slap. The first time he slapped, there was a sudden burst of anger in me and and a sense of getting humiliated, but as I was intensely aware, the feelings immediately died down. Wow! that was great, I wanted to experience this again, so I set him up into slapping me again. He slapped, and once again the anger burst out and died down at once. It was a great feeling that Hitler slapping me in front of all people didn’t have much effect on me. I wanted this one more time, got it, and it had absolutely no negative effects on me. Wonderful! I was so grateful to Hitler for helping me have this great experience and that’s what made me hug him. The chemical reactions of anger getting transformed into love was not actually happening in his brain, but my brain, or to be more accurate in the consciousness, for there is no such thing as my consciousness or his consciousness.

And the Hitler figure is actually an aspect of myself, my base instincts. This was a very figurative dream, a reflection of things that’s been happening in my psyche over the past few months. Previously, I had trained myself into believing that the lower instincts of my mind have to be resisted, controlled, to be fought with. I used to resist them or run away from them. But resistance only makes these instincts stronger, and when you run away, it chases you and pounces on you. Giving free expression to the lower instincts doesn’t help either. So, sometime back there was a shift, instead of trying to overcoming the instincts, I just go into a state of awareness and just watched these instincts for what they are without resisting them or giving expression to them, non-judgmentally. And what happens? The instincts just vanish into thin air. Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone. And the energy that goes into expressing or repressing these lower instincts gets sublimated into higher emotions. Anger, lust, shame getting transformed into love! A wonderful thing.
:)

But one thing about taming Hitler. This was just a dream, honestly, I’m not sure if I have the guts to do such a Gandhigiri act in real life, that too with a person like Hitler. I’ll leave it to you to test the Gandhigiri concept in real life and do write to me about the results. Just give it a try na? Life is just a bigger dream after all ;)

Also read about the dramatic dream I had one and a half years ago about a dog chasing me.

Happy Resurrection Day!

Eckhart Tolle says in his Power of Now, “The secret of life is to ‘die before you die’ — and find that there is no death.”

About 2000 years ago, Jesus did just that, literally.

“If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.”
— Yeshua

On this day, lose your old patterns, die to your past, and resurrect yourself anew. Resurrect yourself not only today, but each day, each moment.

Happy Easter dear friends. :)

Mansur al-Hallaj, the poetic beauty!

I saw my Lord with the eye of the heart. I asked: Who art Thou?
He answered: Thou.

In my subsistence is my annihilation;
In my annihilation, I remain You.

He is hidden in His manifestation, manifest in His concealing.

Thy Spirit is mingled in my spirit
even as wine is mingled with pure water.
When anything touches Thee,
it touches me.
Lo, in every case Thou art I!

Mansur al-Hallaj (c. 858 – 26 March 922) was a Persian mystic, writer and teacher of Sufism.

LOVE ABSOLUTE

Breathe ‘God,’ in any tongue — it means the same;
LOVE ABSOLUTE: Think, feel, absorb the thought;
Shut out all else; until a subtle flame
(A spark from God’s creative centre caught)
Shall permeate your being, and shall glow,
Increasing in its splendour, till, YOU KNOW.

— Ella Wheeler Wilcox (November 5, 1850 – October 30, 1919)

Miracle

Miracle

The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green earth in the present moment, to appreciate the peace and beauty that are available now.

Thich Nhat Hanh (born 11 October 1926)

Photo courtesy: Susana Aalto

Advice from Dogen Zenji

Students, when you want to say something, think about it three times before you say it. Speak only if your words will benefit yourselves and others. Do not speak if it brings no benefit.

Just practice good, do good for others, without thinking of making yourself known so that you may gain reward. Really bring benefit to others, gaining nothing for yourself. This is the primary requisite for breaking free of attachments to the Self.

Dōgen Zenji was a Japanese Zen Buddhist teacher and the founder of the Sōtō school of Zen in Japan.

Your primary responsibility is to take care of yourself

If you want to lead a peaceful life, here is the rule of thumb: Never care about things you can’t control, and take complete responsibility over things you can control.

Things you can’t control: the past, the unseen future, and the way others behave.

Things you can control: what you think, what you speak, what you do in the present moment.

In short, you only need to care about what you are, here and now.

Isn’t this self-centeredness? Of course, we are not preaching selfishness here. We don’t say that you should live only for yourself, or that you shouldn’t help others. Take care of how you help others, take full responsibility of your actions in the present and do your best to help others, but you don’t have the right to worry about the outcome or how the helped will respond to you.

Check out this video where Eckhart Tolle says, “Your primary responsibility is to take care of your state of consciousness which determines the kind of world you create.”

If you think about it, you’ll know that this is the only practical way of living. More than anything else, what you are in the present determines your future. When you take complete responsibility over what you are, what you think, speak and do, everything else takes care of itself.

Isn’t this what is meant in this shloka from the Bhagavad Gita?

You have the right to perform action, but not the fruits thereof at any time; let not the fruits of your actions be your motive, and let there not be attachment to inaction.

— Bhagavad Gita 2.47